


=COUNTIF(Eiji:Oishi, “Inui”)

by BlueMinuet



Category: Tennis no Oujisama | Prince of Tennis
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Office, Corporate Finance, M/M, Office Sex, spreadsheet innuendo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-11
Updated: 2017-04-11
Packaged: 2018-10-17 11:31:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10593147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlueMinuet/pseuds/BlueMinuet
Summary: Searching through the range of Eiji and Oishi’s office romance for the criteria of “times Inui thought one or both of them were hot”, the count is much higher than Inui would like.OR: The time Inui realizes he’s getting too close to his research.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TSwiftEliot](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TSwiftEliot/gifts).



> There's nothing I can say for myself here. Hope you like it, Sarah.

Inui doesn’t bat an eye when he walks into his office to find one of the salesmen practically laying on top of his office mate's desk. Actually, he just takes it as a small mercy that he still has his shirt on. 

Not that Oishi has a bad looking chest. That was never the problem. 

Inui makes a point of closing the door in such a way that the hinges squeak loudly. He could easily fix that, but he finds that they have great utility in these situations. Oishi bolts upright, off of Eiji’s desk, and tries to look composed. Or at least as composed as he can with the top buttons of his shirt undone, and from the way Eiji’s fingers are still twitching in midair, like a cat pawing at nothing, it seems like Eiji was the one responsible for the undoing. For his part, Eiji doesn’t even try to hide his pout. 

“Ah, yes,” Oishi says, in a performatively commanding voice. “Yes, I can see what you were talking about with the expenses in the Red Lace account, _Mister Kikumaru_.” Oishi’s voice drips so heavily with professionalism, Inui expects to find it dribbling onto the carpet and staining. 

(There _is_ a stain just right there where Oishi is standing, but Inui knows he’s the one to blame for that. It’s the testament to the last and only time his office mate agreed to try his high-performance caffeine drink. Eiji’s heart rate still spikes a bit when he drinks anything stronger than decaf.) 

“We’re not contracted with the Red Lace Corporation,” Inui says softly, but with no accusation in his tone. He’s a bit distracted, picking through his filing system to find the right notebook he needs. 

Oishi’s face is noticeably red, though whether it’s due to embarrassment or arousal, Inui can’t quite single out. Better to record both possibilities and wait for further data to surface. 

“Right,” Oishi says. “Right, well. That’s why we couldn’t find the expenses. Right, Eiji?” 

“I think you need to say ‘right’ one more time before he gets the point,” Eiji mutters. He’s openly glaring at the open space where Oishi used to be, and his hand is still groping at nothing. 

“You know, I think I have their proposed contract in my office,” Oishi says, jabbing a thumb over his shoulder in a gesture that proves to be about as subtle as the hints of garlic in Inui’s energy drink. (Not very.) “Do you want to come with me to check it out?” Oishi asks Eiji. 

Eiji’s sour face brightens instantly. “Oooh, or maybe you left it in the supply room! That’s closer.” 

Oishi freezes; signs that this emotional response is embarrassment — perhaps even verging on mortification — are piling up. 

“Y-yeah. We could check there,” Oishi says softly, his voice turning slightly squeaky. He might have stayed a mortified statue in that spot if Eiji hadn’t leaped up instantly and grabbed his hand, pulling them both out of the room. 

Inui calmly cracks open his notebook and takes the necessary observations.

> Monday, 2:34 PM: Encounter with Eiji/Oishi “secret” office romance. Observations:
> 
>   * Oishi is clearly embarrassed and very guarded about the romance. Possibly due to the fact that I am an outsider. 
>   * Should remind Oishi that this is my office too. 
>   * Eiji is becoming less and less guarded. Baseline of asking “Guess who just got lucky in the copier room?” has proceeded to openly trying to grope Oishi in my presence. A full debrief is expected later. 
>   * It appears that Oishi has been working out more, if the state of his mostly bare chest is any indication. 
> 


  


Inui taps his pen slightly while squinting at the last point. It seemed important when it popped into his mind and while he was writing it down, but now seeing it with the rest of his observations it seems to not quite fit the theme of the dataset. 

At first, Inui had started tracking his observations of his office mate’s fling out of pure fascination. Office romances were highly illicit, but Eiji’s confidence that this could fly under the radar of company policy was unshakable. Eiji was always a bit odd, especially for someone in the finance department, but he always knew the rules, even if he occasionally threw them to the wind (or in some cases, the shredder bin). And so far, despite how obvious Eiji had been, no one else at the company seemed to notice, except for his ever-suffering office mate. 

Though, that title didn’t seem to fit quite right. Inui didn’t think he was suffering. Collecting data was… fun? Interesting? Though he had to admit that as of late, his fascination with Eiji’s fling had begun to skew towards some sort of emotional reaction that he couldn’t quite put his finger on. 

Inui pushed that aside, along with his notebook, as he turned back to his computer and tried to focus on the accounting system. 

He did, however, stop working in order to diligently note down the exact time when Eiji strolled back in, grinning with his hair slightly mussed. Eiji flopped down into his leather office chair, grinning at the window with no attempt to awaken his computer. 

Inui opens his mouth to say something, but the words catch in his throat. Eiji looks like he might be glowing, the way the sunlight gleams off of his sweat-damp skin, lighting his face up gold in contrast to his pearly white teeth. 

Inui swallows, slamming shut his observational notebook, and scrambles for a different topic to bring up. “Eiji, were you able to enter the most recent invoices for this week?” 

“Hmmmmm?” Eiji’s hum comes out like a contented purr, and when he finally moves, it’s like his limbs are made of rubber as he languidly sits up and slumps slightly onto his desk. “Oh, yeah. I’ll have that done before close of business today.” 

Inui nods, not really caring. 

“Hey, so remember that thing that I was telling you I wasn’t sure I could pull off?” Eiji says, waving a hand lazily. “You know, where I’m standing on the mop bucket and one leg is on the supply shelves while I’m holding—”

Inui coughs. “Right, I remember.” 

“Well, just wait ‘til I tell you what happened!” Eiji says, holding his hands out excitedly. 

Inui chokes on a groan while reluctantly opening his notebook again.  
  


* * *

  
Eiji groans loudly while flopping into his chair and dramatically lays his head on his desk. 

This sort of scene is prone to happen with something as simple as the kitchen being out of the fruit snacks that Eiji likes, so it takes a full minute for Inui to look up and acknowledge him. He takes his time to finish up writing the equation he’s been typing in his spreadsheet, and then looks over to Eiji. 

“What’s the matter?” 

Eiji huffs, the sound coming out a bit like a sputter since his face is still smushed against the surface of his desk. “You know the monthly business trip I normally take?” 

“Yes?” 

Eiji groans. “They’re sending me on a mandatory training instead.” 

Inui blinks. “Is it about proper office conduct?” 

Eiji shrugs, not getting up from his desk. 

After a moment of consideration, Inui stands up and slowly strides over to Eiji’s desk. He tentatively reaches out, and gives Eiji a pat on the back. “There… there.” Inui is never sure what the proper thing to say in these situations, so he goes for minimalism and keeps rubbing Eiji’s back. 

Eiji sighs into his desk, but does seem to relax just a touch. Inui is a bit gratified that he seems to have been some sort of help, and there’s a small flutter in his chest that he can’t quite explain.

A minute later, Oishi strides into the room. He stops quickly, seeming to take stock of the situation, a bit confused. 

“I, um…” Inui stares at Oishi, not sure how to explain this situation. Then again, there isn’t anything to explain really. He’s not doing anything illicit, objectively or comparatively. “He’s just upset. I’m sure he’ll…” Inui spares a glance down at Eiji, who is moaning just softly now. “I’m sure he’ll be able to speak to you in a minute.” 

“Actually.” Oishi shifts nervously. “I came to talk to you, Inui.” 

Inui raises an eyebrow at that. “Oh.” 

“Yes.” Oishi wrings his hands. “So, you know how Eiji and I go on monthly business trips…” 

Inui swallows thickly.  
  


* * *

  
Inui isn’t sure how it happened so quickly, but soon he’s piled into a car, ready for a work road trip with Oishi. 

It made logical sense; someone from the finance staff had to go. Inui just isn’t sure why it needed to be him. 

But then again, there shouldn’t be anything awkward about it. Shouldn’t, and Inui keeps returning to that point. But he remembers his notebook, and remembers the data points that keep popping up in his observations that by all rights shouldn’t be there. Stuff like how he can almost see the curves of Oishi’s abs when he wears that one white shirt, or the way Eiji’s hair looks amazing after being slightly mused against the extra copier paper. He keeps thinking of stuff like that, which makes it all the more awkward when somehow Oishi is sitting just inches away from him in the passenger seat. 

Oishi smiles at him, a bit nervously, and Inui is wondering what _he_ has to be nervous about. 

“Sorry if I’m not the best travelling company,” Oishi says, cutting through the thick silence. “I’m used to these business trips being… well, I’m used to travelling with Eiji and…” 

Inui just nods. “I understand.” 

Oishi reaches out, and Inui’s brain calculates 37 different trajectories it could be taking before his hand finally rests on the stereo. 

“Maybe some music will help,” Oishi says, and Inui nods a touch too quickly. 

Suddenly a love song is blaring on the speakers. Inui recognizes it as one that was popular on the radio over the last summer, but he hasn’t heard it much since. 

“Oh, sorry,” Oishi says, wincing at the sound. “I had put together a playlist for Eiji and I, and um…” He’s reaching out to change it, but Inui’s hand darts out to stop him, before he can think better of it. 

Their fingers touch, and Inui feels like he’s grazed a live wire.

“No… no, it’s alright,” he says, even though there are alarm bells going off in his brain. “I like… this song is acceptable.” 

“O-okay,” Oishi says, sitting straight in his seat. 

The silence returns, with only the catchy song beats occasionally managing to wedge between them. 

Inui tries not to think about the situation, and ends up mouthing a few of the words to the song without thinking about it. It’s a bit of an earworm, and soon he’s softly singing lyrics that he didn’t realize he knew. 

He looks over to find Oishi staring at him. 

“Oh, sorry,” Inui says. “I can stop.” 

Oishi shakes his head quickly. “No, no. It’s fine.” 

A moment later, Oishi starts singing the harmony.  
  


* * *

  
“Well, it really is interesting what they’re doing with this budget,” Inui says, neck craned over the folder of facts and figures. All in all, Inui found the business trip very informative; he normally never gets a chance to leave the confines of his office. Getting to see Oishi in action was very fascinating, and getting to pour over the proposed budgets while still in the negotiation phase was a bit of a thrill that Inui couldn’t deny. “Do you see what they’re doing with the indirects here?” He leans over, turning the folder towards Oishi. “They—”

He stops short when he looks at Oishi. They’ve returned to the hotel for the night, and the lights are mostly dimmed except for the one right in between their two beds, providing enough light for Inui to delightedly pour through all the numbers. They stopped on the way back for a bottle of wine, two glasses of which are sitting on their shared bedside table. But Oishi seems to have barely touched his, and he’s looking at something else, some notebook sitting on his lap. 

Oishi closes whatever it is quickly and tucks it away to his other side, his eyes getting that shellshocked look, nearly the same as when Inui walks in on him and Eiji. “Sorry, what did you want me to see, Inui?” 

“I, um…” Inui pauses, not sure what he was about to say. He’s curious about what Oishi is hiding, but also he’s suddenly taken aback by how Oishi looks in the low light. He changed into a t-shirt and pajama pants, but somehow he still looks…

Inui gulps. All the errant data that has been crossing his mind suddenly clicks into place, the spreadsheet equation in his brain finally resolving to spit out the correct result. 

Oishi looks hot, and Inui is doomed. 

“I, well…” Inui clears his throat of nothing. “Well, it’s just interesting, because they’re maintaining a low, allowable indirect rate within the budget, but they’re making up for it with… There are… So, there are stipends for… umm…” 

Oishi is leaning closer to him, looking at the folder. When Inui stops speaking altogether, Oishi grabs the wine glass from the table and holds it out to him. 

“Thirsty?” Oishi asks. 

“I…” Inui stands up, dropping the folder on his bed in a haste to put some distance between himself and Oishi. He takes the wine glass though, and takes a gulp that’s perhaps a bit too large to be wise. 

He looks back at Oishi, and only sees a cat-like grin. He wonders about whether people sleeping together tend to pick up each other’s mannerisms. Perhaps he should collect more data to study… 

His eyes wander over Oishi’s bed, until he catches sight of what Oishi had hidden away earlier. 

Inui’s notebook. The one with all the errant (embarrassing) observations. 

“Oh no,” he says out loud, before gulping his wine again. 

Oishi grins, standing and moving closer to him. “I guess you caught me. Sorry for snooping, but…” He chuckles, looking back at the notebook. “Seems you’ve been doing some snooping as well.” 

Inui drains his wine glass. Oishi moves ever closer to him, and Inui isn’t sure what to do. Half of him demands to bolt for escape, while another half tells him to rationally try to get out of the situation, but in the end he stays petrified in place. 

He yelps slightly when Oishi leans in and kisses his cheek. 

“So, the white shirt, huh?” Oishi whispers in his ear. “Guess I should wear that one more often.” 

Inui’s brain catches up with everything and he dodges Oishi a full minute too late, stalking back over to sit on his bed. “Wait, wait. What… What are you…” He shakes his head, trying to clear it of all the irrelevant data clouding it and focus on the matter at hand. The _what_ is becoming fairly clear, but other factors must be addressed. “What about Eiji?” And Inui realizes that this question has layers upon layers, because not only does he not want to cheat over his office mate… but there was also just as much errant data about him cropping up in Inui’s observations. _What about Eiji?_ might be the question of the century, because Inui can just as well imagine Eiji slipping into this scenario as easily as he contorts himself in the supply closet. 

Oishi shrugs. “Well, this is about how our business trip go anyway.”

“Obviously,” Inui says before he can think better of it. “But, you… you two have a… fairly committed office fling?” He’s not sure if the wording is quite right, but it seems accurate. According to his observations, neither of them have been _flinging_ with anyone else. 

Oishi laughs. “Oh, as soon as I found your notebook, I texted Eiji.” He grabs his cellphone from the bed and begins scrolling through his text messages so that Inui can see. “You were pretty distracted for the first few, but I ended up having to turn off both the sound and the vibration, because he wouldn’t stop.” 

As the text messages scroll by, Inui catches a few choice phrases like “OMG!” “Get it, Oishi” and “I’d concatenate with him, if you know what I mean. Tell him that one, he’ll get it.” 

Inui pauses slightly, processing. “So, Eiji is… approving.”

“And thank god too,” Oishi says. “If I had to put up with another day or so with this sexual tension.” 

“T-tension…” 

Oishi sits down on the other bed, smirking softly. The low light still hits his features just right, highlighting each wave in his hair and curve of muscle just barely veiled by his shirt. 

Inui can’t remember later whether he was graceful or pounced like a wild cat, but soon he has Oishi pinned underneath him, kissing every highlighted curve. 

He considers launching a study on whether office mate’s tend to pick up each other’s mannerisms, but shoves that away for a day when he’s not straddling his office mate’s boyfriend.  
  


* * *

  
The following Monday, Inui walks into his office to find Oishi sitting on Eiji’s desk, while Eiji sits in his chair and pulls Oishi down by his tie for a kiss. 

Inui pauses when the two of them turn to look at him. Oishi doesn’t fumble to compose himself though. Instead they both smile at him. 

“Come pull up a chair, Inui,” Eiji says, practically purring. “You still need to debrief me about that business trip you two took.” 

Inui slowly closes the door, careful not to let the hinges squeak, and resolves to fix that at a more opportune time.


End file.
